This month I’ve been learning a lot about receiving and letting go: receiving the goodness the universe offers me at every turn, and letting go of my expectations for how life “should” be.
To be honest, the first two months of the year were pretty rough. There were some circumstances – a break up and an impending move – but most of the suffering was self-induced (isn’t that usually the case!?) I let my mind go into the negative, dark places at nearly any opportunity.
When offered a sweet apartment in a great location, I lamented that I’d have to climb up the hill and wouldn’t ride my bike as much. I worried about the north facing window not providing enough light. I said I wasn’t ready to move.
Some days I was upbeat, looking at new apartment possibilities and willingly starting to pack. Most of the time, though, I was kicking and screaming, resisting change. I even had a nightmare that I would have to sell most of my furniture because the new place was so small.
Let me say that those around me were quite surprised when, upon moving into my new place, I was actually DELIGHTED. I felt so blessed. I saw everything in a new light. The apartment is beautiful. I love the new color of the walls. My furniture has never looked so good! The layout is awesome; everything has a proper place. And, oh, how could I forget? The neighborhood is so special. It’s quiet and residential. And I get to walk up and over Telegraph Hill every day to work. Hello, incredible views.
Quite the turnaround, eh? What surprised me the most was that in spite of my intense resistance to the flow of my life, I was offered such amazing gifts. I’ve learned a lot the past few weeks. Now, when I’m offered something new, my first inclination will be to ask a question: ”I wonder what it would be like to…?” And, after some reflection, if it feels pretty OK — doesn’t have to be or feel perfect — I’m going to practice saying, “Why not?” And see what emerges. Is there a place in your life where an open ended inquiry would bring some light into an otherwise dark corner?
Spring forward – just take that leap! I’ll be right there with you.
Eat well. Be well. Thrive.
E. Chloé Lauer BA, MUP, Certified Health & Lifestyle Coach, Yoga Teacher in Training San Francisco health & lifestyle coach specializing in allergies, Crohn’s/Colitis, and Gluten-Free living; serving the Bay Area and beyond via phone & Skype consultations: sign up here to speak with me!
What a beautiful reflection. Your hesitation is quite understandable. Experiences of loss do not easily propel one into new situations. They push one into change and who wants to be pushed?
Yet, you were willing. You took the advise of those near you to go ahead and make that leap forward! I am glad that your perspective changed on your new home so quickly! Chloe, always the early adaptor!
What a freeing way of looking at life. I, too, have been living under the belief that the universe is a nurturing place. This does not mean that all the people and the systems are good, but at the core, there is a deeply pervasive love that wants to embrace, encourage and empower me.
The openness to seeing what emerges, and to try things on, are good habits to employ. Thanks for sharing them.
Chloe, this is an absolutely beautiful entry, and view into your heart. That is one thing I love about WHO YOU ARE…allowing that to shine through while being vulnerable and encouraging others through tough choices as you work through issues yourself. It’s great! I can connect with your experience, and the pictures really do look like your new home is, well, homey!
Thanks for sharing this, Chloe. You know we all go through patches like this and I am totally with you on realizing that we need to open up to what the universe can offer us when we are positive and in a receiving mode. You’re a special person and an amazing friend
I’m so glad we met.
Thank you for offering up a chapter of your own life as a reminder of how and why to stay in the flow! I relate so much and appreciate the inspiration. Namaste
A beautiful reflection on accepting the self-induced _____ and befriending yourself again. I could relate. Recently, there were three separate self-induced events in my life that took a lot of time and resources. Although I came out two of three okay and seems to be okay on the third (still developing) as well, I have been overly stressed and uncharacteristically suffered. The suffering came from the attachment to the result, rather than just enjoying the moment. As Krishna pointed out in the Gita, performing actions without pre-set expectations is the divine way. So the recent experiences that required the complete attention and presence have been intense, not good or bad/gain or loss, and conducive to letting go of the self-critical way of rendering unnecessary judgment. Upon accepting, the present returns.
Thanks for sharing, Chloe and the commentators. Let’s go with the Flow and nip the seeds of judgment at their roots..